Editing LOVE – Chapter 1: Romanticism

Romanticism. No laundry talk. No domestic chores.  Romantics believe you should not discuss too many personal stuff with your partner. You should not show yourself too much as romanticism involves two partners that immediately understand each other. Haven’t you heard? It’s called intuitive knowing. You are not suppose to explain yourself because if they love you they should get it. I mean you are a romantic (couple) so it is self explanatory, isn’t it?

One of the most common beliefs among romantics is that you destroy the feelings and emotions by thinking too much about them. Because thinking too much breaks things. ‘You just ruined the magic!’
A true lover believes that their partner should just know through any bathroom door. That is why romanticism never lasts. Long term, those bathroom doors just open and there it is: all the shit that people avoid to break about themselves. Short time, it’s definitely all fun, but long term we foresee a catastrophe (by we I mean definitely the experts, ha!).

A romantic believes that when you love someone you simply love everything about them. All the imperfections and even the most annoying things. Until… one morning, when during breakfast you turn to them like: are you a cow or something??! Why are you criticizing me, I thought you love me?! they revolt. Yes, I do love you, but you eat like bovines! And now you’re telling me??!

Well, the truth is nobody is telling you (the entire truth)! Not your parents, not your friends, not even your exes – who are too busy travelling and finding themselves. Just wake up and smell the coffee! We are a bunch of romantic people believing that any discussion of our flaws translates into critique, thus the opposite of love.  If you love me, why do you criticize me? Are you perfect? NO! Then how on earth do you imagine one not noticing?  Disaster idea of romanticism… Sigh.

Ancient greeks believed that love is the admiration for the virtues, accomplishments and perfect sides of another person.  Love is when two people teach one another to become better persons as they have mutual interest to grow one another.  So Love = Mutual Education. Proof that LOVE is an Action!  Good luck at being a good teacher, mate! A good teacher is relaxed and not tied to the idea that his lessons really must come through. It is fine if they don’t. In love there is will. IN LOVE we are tense and on the edge. The background of our thoughts is so much on spectrum… this person is soooo different, and weird, and not seeing me! (fucking daddy issues)

LOVE classes fail between two people when there is humiliation, criticism, nagging and no lessons shared. We usually know so much about our partners but because we think it’s a betrayal by giving them lectures, we do not teach each other the things we could benefit the most from.

Should we reduce our expectations, you ask? No! Let’s have high expectations! Problem is romanticism gives us lots of high exceptions but no WAY how to get them. The secret is to find the ways.  Love is not something you feel, is something you learn to live. It has to come by nature. Love is an action. Love is a skill.


To be continued…
By the one learning about love from the books, YouTube, but most of all, from a lot of forms of love she’s receiving: parents, friends, lovers, colleagues, bosses, and most intensively: her own self. 


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