What are you doing right now? Are you also in a cafe’s window wearing no mask, no bra and staring at the people biking in the rain? This podium feels too good, doesn’t it? I can spot old ladies smoking like there is no tomorrow, baristas hugging before even washing their hands with that sanitizer on the counter. Young parents walking in for coffee and cake, some Chinese rich girls chit-chatting about… well boys and traveling, I imagine.
The word cock distracts the shit out my deep thoughts right now…. What should I blog about today? ‘cock in the morning haha’ a friend replies on Instagram. And I am thinking: why would I write about it? Is it ’cause I miss it, or perhaps to just vent about the reasons I am missing it? The worst book title: How a hot girl cannot get laid. Like who would even wanna read that?!
– Would you like to go out with me? He asks.
– Yes, sure.
– Ok, but could you please don’t write on your blog about me?
Challenge accepted!! my little brain goes. There is nothing to write about people who are afraid of me writing about them. They are just too nice and well educated to cross the line and make me obsess with their reactions. Let me just put it out there: I only write to let it out! the anger, the disappointment, the happiness, the fucking pride I have in living some dramatic story that will probably make you smile and feel good someone is doing worse than you.. Like this cock work on the danish water bottle that serves my table as a vase. I just googled Hancock – it’s a movie, it’s an old Danish brewery brand. It has a cock symbol and it makes everyone think of dick. Cause I make it so. ha!
What’s your life? you ask me. Just this morning Alison sent me this ad:
For a new program on TV2 we are looking for a sparkling, fun and fantastic woman in the 30’s who is tired of superficial dates. You’ve reached the point where you want to find love. We will create a real and entertaining TV series where you will have a unique opportunity to find a match that fits you and your values. At the end of June 5 men matching one or more of your wishes will move back to you for a weekend from Friday to Sunday. Over the three days you get to know the five suitors better, and after a separation process that you control, hopefully end up with the perfect match! We look forward to hearing from you.
to all my danish speaking girl friends, you can sign up at the link below:https://shortaudition.net/5-Fyre-Flytter-Ind
– It’s SO you! (you think)
– Right? (me rolling my eyes)
I am rolling my eyes cause I am tired. I am tired of you thinking I am all about fucking dating. I mean, yea, I woke up the other day and asked a friend to create a dating profile for me and get me a date. 8 hours later I was dressing up and heading to my first blind date ever. That was the most thrilling thing I did that could probably entertain you. It was fun, you should try it. If only you are as lucky as my ass to have such a cool friend as me. I mean, I didn’t even see my pictures, headlines or chat with that guy. It was a great date. Probably one of the bests, just because there was so much mystery/newness in all the sensations I got.
Oh, you ask me what drove me do it? You’d be surprised (or not!) but it was this message I got from another girl friend showing me the last guy I crushed is on Tinder. Oh yea, I said? fuck waiting for him. I’ll show you dating haha. Gosh, I am bored, ain’t I? few days later here I am crying on my blog that my date never texted me and I just saw the crush guy kissing another girl near my house. Auch, I know. Universe slapped me again. Many spikes hit my … whatever heart I have left for this. But I did ask for it. 😉
I am a bit angry, I’ll admit it. I wanna react arrogant and condescending right now, but to be fully honest… I really don’t give much of a damn about any of this. All I actually care is to get a smile out of you and make you think and talk about this. Then I will be moving on to next adventures. Wink! And if i triggered in you another reaction or question, please do text me.
Now, before I leave this cafe, I wish you have the place where you can walk naked all day every day, where you have all the right cock in the morning, whether that is water or dick. And if you love pussy, please do me a favor and tell her!