Date Someone Who Will Break Your Heart

You should date someone who treats you like shit and eventually makes you feel the shittiest you’ve ever been.

 

 No, I am not sarcastic. We are all scared. Scared of being rejected, scared of being lied to, cheated on and hurt in ways we could only imagine. Mostly because we’ve seen it in the movies or on our friends who have experienced some shitty “situationships”.

 

If you know me a little bit, you know that my heart was broken. Plenty of times. The first time it happened it was because of my first sweetheart boyfriend. And although it was just a short and cute relationship, the way he forgot about me one night and the rest of that summer still haunts me. I promised myself I will never ever wait for a guy to text me or come back to me after that one. Of course, that promise was broken way too many times, but hey, aren’t we here to learn from our mistakes? I met that boy again four months later and I told him I missed him and been thinking about him. You know what he said?

 

–  And now you’re telling me? Why didn’t you say anything few months ago? I have a girlfriend now.
This is the reason why I don’t wait for guys to text me anymore. Well, I still do, but not for months. Because now I know that if they don’t text it probably means they have a new girl friend on the radar. Trust me, I’ve been testing this theory way too many times.

 

The second guy who broke my heart was… strategic. He put me up so high on a pedestal I felt I can rule the world. For a short while. Then he just let me there to deal with all that. I had no idea what to do but fall. And boy, that hurt as fuck! Six years later he apologized for the ghosting and admitted he was an idiot, but also the fact that I was out of his league and a bit too much for his waters. Fair enough.

 

The third one, and hopefully the last one, broke every single part of my heart in a million pieces. He made sure I felt like he doesn’t care about my needs, my wants, my ambitions, my thoughts because they were never good enough. All my friends and family hated the guts out of him. They still do. And even though deep down I knew he’s an asshole, I always wondered what did I do wrong. I questioned everything and hoped I would be someone else, something more… just to be enough for him to change and love me back. Oh boy, how I blamed myself for his issues and for him treating me like shit.

 

Not only that this guy would make me think he forgot about me every time I didn’t need it to, but he also pushed me so high on some peaks I’ve never been before. And even after climbing all the mountains I could reach for him, I discovered the oceans, learned how to sail, and went exploring lands I could never imagine. Yup, all because one stupid guy. But don’t follow my example. I just have weird taste in men.

 

Don’t worry, eventually, I got my shit together. One day it just didn’t hurt anymore. And ever since, not only that I fucking know how I want to be treated, but also how to deal and live with where I am left on. Make it a pedestal, a mountain peak, in the middle of the ocean or my own bed. I am there already! And I know how to get back. To myself. Always.

 

So date people who break your heart. It will let you know who you are, what you deserve and how to ask for what you want. Moreover, it will get you to meet people who will put back all the pieces of your heart. And when that is complete again, someone else will be attracted and destined to try to break it. Because that’s what people do. They break wholes and fill holes.

 

IMG_2045
When you have no idea what you caused in a girl’s head

 

Funny game, right?
🙂

achy breaky heart

Windy, rainy and darky weather these days in Copenhagen, people.  But this is also the forecast for my achy breaky heart… For more than a year when I didn’t even get jealous or interested in any of my exes girlfriends, well let’s just say I started counting the days and hours till I see my crush. But this is not just pissing me out, but even people I don’t know their last name get to hear me winning about it. I guess it has been a year when everyone got themselves “one of those things called girlfriends” and I was just spending too much time online and being too lazy to go out. Oh well, lemme just quote from porn hub’s tweets: “karma is like 69 – you get what you give.” 😁
The other day I was waiting for a friend outside of a store and while with one hand I was holding my bike with the other one I was checking Tinder messages and guess what I dropped? MiPhone (because the bike was the better choice). But right there, coming from the unknown of real-life, 2 guys pick up my phone and didn’t walk away without saying: “Tinder is dangerous!”

Damn it. I grinned and felt such an idiot. They were right even though I was really only checking … but then I kept thinking wtf am I still doing on Tinder?! I mean I get so many weird texts that it makes me want to drop my phone. Like this one:

 Hi Viorela,

you probably wonder why I added you. I saw you on tinder and your first name is quite unique, so it was easy to find you here.

Dont worry, I am not a stalker. I just thought about your tinder text and you are absolutely right. It´s really a pain in the ass to find a good partner in this city, especially as a foreigner.

I can promise you 2 things:

1. I am serious about finding someone, not like a lot of other people on tinder (both genders) who are just looking for a hook up.

2. I am a foreigner and also dont understand the danish way of dating (you know, dont talking unless they are totally drunk, then have sex and on the next morning pretending not to know you)

If you like this mail, lets go out for a date. I am not that fashion oriented as you are – might be the difference between studying IT and working in IT, but I am a nice guy 😊

Have a lovely weekend

Jan

This guy deleted me after I spent 18 hours thinking of a decent reply. I guess I will just post it here since I am so unique and easy to find!

Dear Jan,

Damn, boy, you got me so wrong! First of all, me not liking your profile was the first sign we are not a match. Then it comes my description. Really?! I mentioned jobs and apartments in the same line and level as boyfriends as being on one’s searching list in this city. But I get your focus on love life since we were o Tinder and you worked your IT skills to find me on Facebook. But I can tell you 2 things about me:

1. My kind of seriousness on finding someone is definitely not on Tinder. Which actually makes me one of those who are just looking for a hookup. Actually, I was also looking for jobs and apartments 😉

2. I am a foreigner but I have never had such amazing dates like the ones Danes offered me and more importantly: thought me. I actually learned how to date here and, yeah I can totally get drunk and forget your name forever if I want to, but I know to make the most nervous or cocky guy remember mine forever too. Yes, after one date!

Now, if you are still stalking me and see this, please don’t bother asking me out again. We were never a match and even though you might be a nice guy, I will never fall for that.

Have a nice life!

V.

Now, I m sure there are thousands of special girls out there who are dying for this kind of love stories, but this guy wasn’t even good looking for my shitty tastes in men. You can call me a big of an ass right now and I don’t blame you, but I know what and who I want (even though he’s just not that into me and my mom told me to hold my horses).

Oh well… Goodbye Tinder guys, 7th edition. Guess breaking my phone and getting a new story is what I needed 😉

PS: I haven’t told my crush I wanna date him and I would like him to at least text me (Yes, he has my phone number) and give me that heartbreak I’m scared to get by myself. So, dude, please, make the right call in here. Thank you! ❤️